Hey Nonny

If you wanted to sum Heather up in one word it would be Cougar.  (And not just because she went to Apex High School and has school spirit.)  She lives in North Carolina with her husband Mark, who is 9 years her junior.  She wanted to go younger, but getting married at 29, any younger would have been practically illegal.  And she is nothing if not a law abiding citizen.  You can find her regularly at http://www.balladofthemckeons.blogspot.com

They say you can’t escape your past, and they are right.  Not necessarily in an “I Know What You Did Last Summer” sort of way.  But we are all products of our youth.  Take me for example.  I spent the majority of my middle and high school years listening to The Cure, The Smiths, and R.E.M.  So it may not come as too much of a surprise to hear that I am a sucker for a guy in black eyeliner.  I mean weak in the knees.  Pupils dilating.  Sucker.  Unfortunately my husband is weird about putting things on his skin.  His often naked or shirtless childhood photos attest to this.  He won’t even wear a band-aid, let alone eyeliner.  Which is sad for me and my pre-Mark dreams of leather pants and eyeliner… but I digress.  My point is- I have a crush on the things of my youth.

About eight years ago I bought these shoes for myself because they were the girl version (pink!) of the black and white shoes worn by my 5^th grade crush.  I don’t even remember that boy’s name, but oh how I felt the butterflies of childhood love when I saw these shoes.  When my sister had an 80s party for her birthday, Mark dressed up in ripped jeans, an old concert t-shirt over a thermal shirt, and converse.  I was swooning.  I laughed (to disguise my sincerity) and told him he needed to dress like this every day.  He looked so much like practically every crush I’d had in school that it was killing me.  He of course laughed, in all sincerity, and thought that I looked ridiculous.  But you see Mark was a baby in the 80s.  So he doesn’t have an 80s crush like me.  I’m all in love with the 80s and 90s and he’s all in love with the 90s and 2000s.  (So this is where that nine year age gap rears its ugly head.)  Mark loves the 90s in the same adoring, childlike way that I love the 80s – he actually likes Hootie and the Blowfish and thinks Shannen Doherty is hot.  (I didn’t find out about Shannen Doherty until after we were married.  That one is almost a deal breaker.)  Whereas I want to invest in a wardrobe of button down shirts, sweater vests, cuffed jeans, and converse so that Mark will look like Jake Ryan every day.  (In fact I think I will.  What do you mean you didn’t want a sweater vest and jeans for your birthday?  Wait… is it bad that I keep wanting to dress my husband up in outfits?)

The funniest thing of all is that we chuckle about current fashion, thinking “oh hilarious, I used to wear that.”  (You know you do, just like your mom used to when you were in high school.)  All the tweens and teens dressed up like 80s pop stars.  Or better yet hipsters.  You and I both know that hipsters are just 90s Seattle grunge in skinny jeans.  Flannel anyone?  Only let’s make it tighter.  It’s mountain chic.   But we have to face the facts; they are dressed like that because we – the tweens and teens of the 80s and 90s – are the fashion designers of today.  And we all have a crush on our youth.  If I were a fashion designer I would be shouting, “wait, don’t forget about the plastic charm necklaces!  We must do a line of those.”   I absolutely adored my pink plastic charm necklace in elementary school, and also anything to do with Jem.

So there it is.  My heart on my sleeve 80s and 90s.  You found out, I’ve got a crush on you.  (I hope Mark won’t be too jealous.)